If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
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