How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
