K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
