Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize