doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
