if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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