You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize