Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
