I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
