who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'm sobbing to NWA
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