we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
