Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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