Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
