YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
love makes seman taste better
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
