'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
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