so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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