If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize