I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
