Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i barfeds in our rink
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize