Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Randomize
