The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
