I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
