Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
