So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
