Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
