somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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