and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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