I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I just found puke in my bra..
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
