Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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