Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
