Define "chronic" masturbator.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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