Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
one might say we're banned from that church
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize