I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
