With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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