Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
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I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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