ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
