Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
