we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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