We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Randomize
