I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize