sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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