Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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