We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
