So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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