so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
The power of my boobs compel you
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
