So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i think my mom watched the whole time
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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