please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
