I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
