Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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