Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
