I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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